When a child discloses
Whenever a child under the age of 18 tells someone that they are being or have been harmed or abused this is known as a disclosure. Children rarely make disclosures but when they do it indicates that they feel they can trust the person they disclose to and most likely are seeking help.
Guidelines for handling disclosures of sexual abuse by children:
The disclosure process to follow when a child discloses other types of abuse (for example, physical abuse or neglect) is:
1. Listen, listen, listen…and do not add anything.
2. When listening to a child remember:
- that children often talk about difficult or painful things in a roundabout way
- that children need assurance from adults that it is OK to talk about upsetting things
- children often feel ashamed and frightened and find it hard to find the right words to explain
- being observant will help you pick up non-verbal clues about what is wrong
- a child may drop hints when something is wrong, for example, “I don’t like so and so. Do you like him/her?”
3. Tell the child, “You are not to blame”.
4. Do not press the child for information or push the child to reveal the details of the abuse. Do not ask leading questions, rather listen carefully and if possible take notes of what the child states, including any dates, times or locations of the alleged abuse.
5. Reassure the child, “You are right to tell and I take what you say very seriously.” Reassure the child, “I will not tell X [the name of the adult who is the subject of the disclosure] what you have told me.”
6. Tell the child that you and the church are there to help and you will be telling the Safe Church Unit what has been said so that the child can receive help.
7. Other than telling the child that you will not tell the adult who is the subject of the disclosure, what the child has said, do not promise not to tell anyone else. Rather, say “There are people who can help you and I will tell them.”
8. Finish on a positive note and tell the child “I am pleased you told me this. You are not alone.”
If you consider that the child is in immediate danger call the State Police 000 and follow their instructions. Stay with the child and then call the SCU on 0477 677 799.
If there is no immediate danger then as soon as possible after the disclosure make handwritten notes of exactly what the child said and the date and time of the meeting. Alternatively, start an Incident Report in SMO (Safety Management Online) immediately which can be done on your smartphone.
Remember:
- Sometimes a child discloses abuse to a person who the child feels safe with or trusts. In this situation carefully listen, reassure the child and tell them you will help them.
- Make notes of exactly what the child has said and note the date and time
- Contact the Police if you consider the child is in immediate danger and then contact the SCU
- If no immediate danger contact your state’s Child Protection Department and then contact the SCU